please do check out my new blog. Its pollyperiwinkle.wordpress.com
visit my new fresh and neat blog. ^_^
Friday, May 21, 2010
Friday, May 14, 2010
Patay Kang Bata Ka!
For whatever reason i felt really tired the moment i woke up this morning.Lack of rest and sleep for the past few weeks probably plus i dont eat on time. I was late for my Philosophy class this morning but i guess Sir Medel was nice enough to understand that. Im glad he was. After Philo class i wnet out and had breakfast at the food court iw as alone, sending friends messages that I've been very dizzy and asking them what should i do. Most of them knew that i havnet eaten my breakfast yet. I was that thrifty but i guess if I'd be rushed to the hospital again then that wouldnt be consudered as "thrifty" at all. Its a good thing John sent me a message. That he was on his way to the print shop. he invited me to go with him. And so i went because i felt like i needed to walk to keep me up and also to avoid myself from falling. I cant barely see where im going beacsue iw as too dizzy, i felt like i had fever that time.
"Hi lyssa, i still have 48 seconds left which means im still on time."
without telling him he knew that punctuality is a must for me
"Thats alright, my goodness you look really stressed!"
"Yeah i have to have my resume printed and i have to fix a few things at the tech building. Is it your break time."
"yup, id be very willing to help you out."
"you'd rather be busy than bored dear!" he laughingly said.
I just replied with a smile not telling him how dizzy i was.
We were about to cross the street as we walk to the internet shop so we can layout his portfolio. I car was moving really fas. Tnhedriver was probably uncertain if we would cross or not which made him think if he would pull his breaks or not. John went forward then he went backward a few steps he was pulling my hand backward as i go forward to the next side of the street and i was about to be hit by the car. Not to mention the car was obviously brand new.
I couldnt tell john that im having problems with my eyesight. I stopped wearing my glasses four years ago and stopped attending to my opthalmologist since i stopped. I was worried that it would cause too much so i decided to get rid of my glasses. But todays situation proved my great need for a new pair of glasses. Id probably look ofr a new doctor after we pay my tuition fee.
Going back, instead of having a trauma we just laughed at it. Thats the advantage of having gay people around. John is always busy but is happy, working and studying at the same time. Yup in the fashion industry he already sold his designs and built a good impression to his boss. Thats probably why his boyfreind was proud of him all along.
John is one of the popel who enjoyed having conversations with me, of course we agree on alot of stuff. We may have different beliefs but one great thing about my friend is he just makes me laugh at things instead of thinking about it over and over again.
"You bother too much dear." he always says
we finished all his tasks in approximately 45 minutes rushing here and there. Ive seen his works its just amazing, a few years from now i wont be surprised if he would become a great advertiser.
i packed his things while he fixes his paper works
we walked back to the building for my next class
"Thanks, bye na lyssa"
"Bye john"
hahah the best part is the beso-beso part hahah i dont know i just find it very comforting.
Im thankful to have John in my circle, very professional yet very unique fun what can i say? A fashion designer will always be fabulous in his or her own fashionable way.
He gave me my ticket to the Philippine fashion week. He had me as part of the guest list with my own special seat. Im really happy to have this great opportunity. Being a writer is really fun! Of cpurse i have to go to the event just incase our magazine will cover this particular event at least i would have some things to write about.
After the Philippine fashion week, id be heading straight o quezon avenue to celebrate Lola's birthday I was asked to sing and play the violin at the vent plus i might act out as the young emilia in the skit. Oh well i can imagine how tired would i be on that day. hahaha I'll commute on dress and heels! It would be one gerat adventure i must say!
"Hi lyssa, i still have 48 seconds left which means im still on time."
without telling him he knew that punctuality is a must for me
"Thats alright, my goodness you look really stressed!"
"Yeah i have to have my resume printed and i have to fix a few things at the tech building. Is it your break time."
"yup, id be very willing to help you out."
"you'd rather be busy than bored dear!" he laughingly said.
I just replied with a smile not telling him how dizzy i was.
We were about to cross the street as we walk to the internet shop so we can layout his portfolio. I car was moving really fas. Tnhedriver was probably uncertain if we would cross or not which made him think if he would pull his breaks or not. John went forward then he went backward a few steps he was pulling my hand backward as i go forward to the next side of the street and i was about to be hit by the car. Not to mention the car was obviously brand new.
I couldnt tell john that im having problems with my eyesight. I stopped wearing my glasses four years ago and stopped attending to my opthalmologist since i stopped. I was worried that it would cause too much so i decided to get rid of my glasses. But todays situation proved my great need for a new pair of glasses. Id probably look ofr a new doctor after we pay my tuition fee.
Going back, instead of having a trauma we just laughed at it. Thats the advantage of having gay people around. John is always busy but is happy, working and studying at the same time. Yup in the fashion industry he already sold his designs and built a good impression to his boss. Thats probably why his boyfreind was proud of him all along.
John is one of the popel who enjoyed having conversations with me, of course we agree on alot of stuff. We may have different beliefs but one great thing about my friend is he just makes me laugh at things instead of thinking about it over and over again.
"You bother too much dear." he always says
we finished all his tasks in approximately 45 minutes rushing here and there. Ive seen his works its just amazing, a few years from now i wont be surprised if he would become a great advertiser.
i packed his things while he fixes his paper works
we walked back to the building for my next class
"Thanks, bye na lyssa"
"Bye john"
hahah the best part is the beso-beso part hahah i dont know i just find it very comforting.
Im thankful to have John in my circle, very professional yet very unique fun what can i say? A fashion designer will always be fabulous in his or her own fashionable way.
He gave me my ticket to the Philippine fashion week. He had me as part of the guest list with my own special seat. Im really happy to have this great opportunity. Being a writer is really fun! Of cpurse i have to go to the event just incase our magazine will cover this particular event at least i would have some things to write about.
After the Philippine fashion week, id be heading straight o quezon avenue to celebrate Lola's birthday I was asked to sing and play the violin at the vent plus i might act out as the young emilia in the skit. Oh well i can imagine how tired would i be on that day. hahaha I'll commute on dress and heels! It would be one gerat adventure i must say!
The Mystery Fiddler Upstairs
I was looking for music sheets in the internet, as i study the notes in Josh Groban's "You Raise Me Up" i came across a link leading me to another music sheet."Broken Vow" by Lara Fabian. Browsing the whole music sheet made me recall the Fiddler who lived at the 4th floor of the building.Lest assume that hes a lad. I've been listening tot hat fiddler ever since we lived here. Im one of the witnesses to his progress. I heard him practice from twinkle twinkle little star up to the most difficult piece he can play. He usually plays from 6pm then resumes after dinner time until eleven midnight. Most of the time i get really fascinated with his determination to perfect his slurs and fiddling. But sometimes i get irritated with it of course there are moments that he suck at his music sheets but i didnt mind. He reminded me of my dream to play the violin way back when i was still in grade 6. I didnt have my violin that time, but he just inspird me to play, even though i didnt get to meet him. He was my invisible icon and im his secret fan.
Broken vow as the last music sheet i heard from him. He played it enthusiastically, i can feel it through his fiddling. He plays it slowly, with control to the volume, His music seemed like a very sweet lullaby to my ears i couldnt remember how many nights have i fallen asleep with fascination, relaxed by his music. But after a few weeks, i saw a few men carrying furnitures from the 4th floor going to the ground floor, and at the ground floor a big truck awaits.
I never thought that i wouldnt get to hear my favorite fiddler play every night. Imiss the times wherein i cheer him up inside whenever he doesnt seem to play his slur perfectly.
After a few months i got my violin, and was hoping that someday i would get to play "broken Vow" the way he played it. I was really hoping that he could hear it and we could probably play while his on the 4th floor and im on the third. His room is probably on top of mine, because the music goes directly to my room and is louder in my room whenever he starts playing upstairs.
Im still dreaming taht we can play Canon in D i play the melody and he plays the back up part i can imagine how wonderful it would be. But everything is just only in my imagination. Ive never known any of my neighbors here aside from the nice chinese family who lived across our unit.
Now i have my own violin. im still glad that i was encouraged by this invisible fiddler.
Broken vow as the last music sheet i heard from him. He played it enthusiastically, i can feel it through his fiddling. He plays it slowly, with control to the volume, His music seemed like a very sweet lullaby to my ears i couldnt remember how many nights have i fallen asleep with fascination, relaxed by his music. But after a few weeks, i saw a few men carrying furnitures from the 4th floor going to the ground floor, and at the ground floor a big truck awaits.
I never thought that i wouldnt get to hear my favorite fiddler play every night. Imiss the times wherein i cheer him up inside whenever he doesnt seem to play his slur perfectly.
After a few months i got my violin, and was hoping that someday i would get to play "broken Vow" the way he played it. I was really hoping that he could hear it and we could probably play while his on the 4th floor and im on the third. His room is probably on top of mine, because the music goes directly to my room and is louder in my room whenever he starts playing upstairs.
Im still dreaming taht we can play Canon in D i play the melody and he plays the back up part i can imagine how wonderful it would be. But everything is just only in my imagination. Ive never known any of my neighbors here aside from the nice chinese family who lived across our unit.
Now i have my own violin. im still glad that i was encouraged by this invisible fiddler.
Thursday, May 13, 2010
The Right Right and my 10 wacky confessions
I had fun watching "How to train your dragon" which somewhat encouraged me to have a puppy and probably train it "the dragon way" (laughs) I grew up categorizing issues whether if its right or wrong. But as i keep walking on my own life's adventure, i realized that its possible to have a wrong in every right and right in every wrong. We live in a world full of flaws. I grew up that way, fighting for the right right or most of the time, the right in my head. But sometimes i guess life isnt about being just right or wrong.
In logic, Right vs. wrong is considered as a contrary rather than a contradictory. Being categorized as a contrary term opens all the possibilities of having a middle term. And i guess my own life experience figured out the possible term to the "Right vs. wrong" case.
Life isnt always about being right or being wrong sometimes its a matter of being right or being happy. the happy as mentioned isnt tantamount to something wrong but probably its something closer to the right right side of the statement.
being right vs. being happy hmmmm... gives me an idea that the right as mentioned doesnt necessarily mean that thr "right" there means perfectly right.. in fact it only proves that there can be a possible wrong in that right (laughs) what am i talking about? (laughs)
Well trying to be right is a tough thing i must say, i lost alotta significant people in my life because of my desperation to be right, and be right right the wrong way.
Conflicts! Do we keep arguing how right we are? or we just settle things admit how wrong we are and just be happy! (laughs)
I feel like im getting really childish recently or probably just enjoying my last two years wherein i can still be child-like whenever i want to.
Ive been experimenting on things recently, which eases the stress and which makes me happy. My natural childish ways are effective so far. Besides i really doubt that i look like an 18 year old... unless i fix myself to look like one! ^_^
I also tried doing fun and crazy things ahahah alright heres the part where I'll confess those wacky stuff ive been doing.
1.) I dance to the tune of gee, and the famous super junior imitating their steps its up to you how will you imagine me doing those funny steps
2.) I eat yogurt mixed with crushed almonds, sliced dried apricots and gummi bears (well those added ingredients were just given by mom's best friend who just arrived from Canada
3.) I sing Korean pop and Japanese Songs while taking a bath
4.) I eat a lot as in!
5.) When im home alone i pretend that im in a fashion show i put my clothes on, strike a pose and invent my own clothing line. I wear my clothing combination and take pictures of me haha
6.) I imitate Doraemon's voice (only when im alone)
7.) I pretend that im batman
8.) If i hate somebody i copy paste his or her photo in face book and play with it by the use of MS Paint
9.) I sing twinkle twinkle little star when i get so angry (like a child who sings on top of her lungs)
10.) i pretend that im a panda when i eat vegetables
In logic, Right vs. wrong is considered as a contrary rather than a contradictory. Being categorized as a contrary term opens all the possibilities of having a middle term. And i guess my own life experience figured out the possible term to the "Right vs. wrong" case.
Life isnt always about being right or being wrong sometimes its a matter of being right or being happy. the happy as mentioned isnt tantamount to something wrong but probably its something closer to the right right side of the statement.
being right vs. being happy hmmmm... gives me an idea that the right as mentioned doesnt necessarily mean that thr "right" there means perfectly right.. in fact it only proves that there can be a possible wrong in that right (laughs) what am i talking about? (laughs)
Well trying to be right is a tough thing i must say, i lost alotta significant people in my life because of my desperation to be right, and be right right the wrong way.
Conflicts! Do we keep arguing how right we are? or we just settle things admit how wrong we are and just be happy! (laughs)
I feel like im getting really childish recently or probably just enjoying my last two years wherein i can still be child-like whenever i want to.
Ive been experimenting on things recently, which eases the stress and which makes me happy. My natural childish ways are effective so far. Besides i really doubt that i look like an 18 year old... unless i fix myself to look like one! ^_^
I also tried doing fun and crazy things ahahah alright heres the part where I'll confess those wacky stuff ive been doing.
1.) I dance to the tune of gee, and the famous super junior imitating their steps its up to you how will you imagine me doing those funny steps
2.) I eat yogurt mixed with crushed almonds, sliced dried apricots and gummi bears (well those added ingredients were just given by mom's best friend who just arrived from Canada
3.) I sing Korean pop and Japanese Songs while taking a bath
4.) I eat a lot as in!
5.) When im home alone i pretend that im in a fashion show i put my clothes on, strike a pose and invent my own clothing line. I wear my clothing combination and take pictures of me haha
6.) I imitate Doraemon's voice (only when im alone)
7.) I pretend that im batman
8.) If i hate somebody i copy paste his or her photo in face book and play with it by the use of MS Paint
9.) I sing twinkle twinkle little star when i get so angry (like a child who sings on top of her lungs)
10.) i pretend that im a panda when i eat vegetables
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Its a good day
Today felt different in math class, of course it began with a wonderful conversation with Kate, my Korean classmate who seemed to love my company ever since the semester began. We became really close friends and really close competitors in seat works, exams etc. Although every now and then I have to translate everything my professor says in class especially whenever he spills jokes i have to translate the whole thing to Kate before i can laugh at it. But i dont regret doing these things for her, she very much interested with the Filipino culture and usually asks me questions that would seriously lead me to talking about Science, Philosophy etc. We always have a very open conversation that we jump from different topics from time to time, i even get to have free Korean Language lessons. and in return i stand as her translator, i help enrich her English and Filipino vocabulary. Its funny how she insists things like, she thought i was romantically attached to a schoolmate who happens to be a guy from our department, When in fact he was just asking me to help him out with the home works and schedules of activities.
She wants me to try out Korean food, Korean Noodles to be specific. And the famous Kimchi that seemed to fit almost all their dishes.
"I was surprised, how you Filipinos eat chicken with rice, in Korea chicken is treated like a side dish and is not eaten with rice."
"And why are your noodles so small?" she asked
I asked her if she eats that regularly and she said "yes many many times!" But before i tell her how unhealthy it is, she added by saying " I just put many many Kimchi in it and it tastes good!"
At the back of my head i was thinking about the instant noodles, no im pretty sure it wasnt because im hungry. The image of Korea's Cup Noodles standing beside our cup noodles here in the Philippines.
As the conversationwent on, she kept asking about the Filipino culture, traditional Filipino clothing, famous Filipino food, system of government, malls. I never wanted to talk ill about my own country but there are some aspects that i have to admit to her real things, like why most Filipinos dont seem to love their own language, Why we chose to adapt with the western culture and forgot our own.
it felt bad. Seriously.
And i believe she noticed that.
We only have 15 minutes left before dismissal.
"Class dismissed" says Prof Concepcion
"Ano yang libro na yan Ms. Mortega?" he noticed the book i have on top of my desk i wonder if it was the red paper back cover, Its probably because red was his lucky color of the day according to today's Fung Shui.(laughs)
As i handed the book to him to have him take a closer look and read the teaser he held my ID and was looking on my "Circle Magazine I.D."
"Ikaw ito hija?"
"Yes sir"
"Ka-gandang bata, o eh tungkol saan naman itong binabasa mo? Mukhang maganda ang kuwento, maganda nga ba?"
"So far sir, maganda po"
Kate was waiting beside me that time, while my professor was asking me about what happened to my math subject during the previous semesters. Hew asked us out of the classroom and asked where do i live and why was i with Kate, if we go home together? and other stuff. As we reach the staircase i just said
"Bye sir, thank you po."
"Ok bye hija"
i was surprised why our professor consulted me after class, and was interested about the book, or was it just the color?
"baka nakokonsensya lang siya dahil pinahiya niya ako sa klase dahil kumukunot yung kilay ko pag nagmemental math during discussions malas daw kasi iyon, sa pera, sa grades, sa lovelife at iba pang kamalasan daw ang mapupunta sa akin."
But i didnt take that seriously, in fact i laughed with them during that time that he publicly did that in class "ang mang okray"
I walked down the building smiling while translating what happened to Kate, she walked me to the gate, and told me that she had to wait for a friend which means i have to take it from there. again, i saw the spot where i saw the boy yesterday, the boy who begged for something to eat, i tried to look if he was there, i wonder if he would expect to see me again, at the same spot. But he wasnt there, he never had intentions of taking advantage of the goodness i showed him yesterday.
"Gusto ko pa sanang bumawe, hindi ako nag meryenda para sana bumile ng malaking Chips ahoy para sa kanya o bumile sa mcdo ng 1pc chicken meal"
But he wasnt there.
I wonder if he was happy while eating what i gave him, or if he ever thought of sharing it to his friends.
All i know is if i didnt gave him something yesterday, and waited for the next day to come, i would surely regret it for the rest of my life.
Its a good day
its a good day
She wants me to try out Korean food, Korean Noodles to be specific. And the famous Kimchi that seemed to fit almost all their dishes.
"I was surprised, how you Filipinos eat chicken with rice, in Korea chicken is treated like a side dish and is not eaten with rice."
"And why are your noodles so small?" she asked
I asked her if she eats that regularly and she said "yes many many times!" But before i tell her how unhealthy it is, she added by saying " I just put many many Kimchi in it and it tastes good!"
At the back of my head i was thinking about the instant noodles, no im pretty sure it wasnt because im hungry. The image of Korea's Cup Noodles standing beside our cup noodles here in the Philippines.
" Sa noodles pa lang talo na tayo, Sa punto pa lang na yun makikita gaano kalayo ang Korea sa atin, at sa kabilang banda kitang-kita kung gaano kaliit ang Pilipinas."
As the conversationwent on, she kept asking about the Filipino culture, traditional Filipino clothing, famous Filipino food, system of government, malls. I never wanted to talk ill about my own country but there are some aspects that i have to admit to her real things, like why most Filipinos dont seem to love their own language, Why we chose to adapt with the western culture and forgot our own.
it felt bad. Seriously.
And i believe she noticed that.
We only have 15 minutes left before dismissal.
"Class dismissed" says Prof Concepcion
"Ano yang libro na yan Ms. Mortega?" he noticed the book i have on top of my desk i wonder if it was the red paper back cover, Its probably because red was his lucky color of the day according to today's Fung Shui.(laughs)
As i handed the book to him to have him take a closer look and read the teaser he held my ID and was looking on my "Circle Magazine I.D."
"Ikaw ito hija?"
"Yes sir"
"Ka-gandang bata, o eh tungkol saan naman itong binabasa mo? Mukhang maganda ang kuwento, maganda nga ba?"
"So far sir, maganda po"
Kate was waiting beside me that time, while my professor was asking me about what happened to my math subject during the previous semesters. Hew asked us out of the classroom and asked where do i live and why was i with Kate, if we go home together? and other stuff. As we reach the staircase i just said
"Bye sir, thank you po."
"Ok bye hija"
i was surprised why our professor consulted me after class, and was interested about the book, or was it just the color?
"baka nakokonsensya lang siya dahil pinahiya niya ako sa klase dahil kumukunot yung kilay ko pag nagmemental math during discussions malas daw kasi iyon, sa pera, sa grades, sa lovelife at iba pang kamalasan daw ang mapupunta sa akin."
But i didnt take that seriously, in fact i laughed with them during that time that he publicly did that in class "ang mang okray"
I walked down the building smiling while translating what happened to Kate, she walked me to the gate, and told me that she had to wait for a friend which means i have to take it from there. again, i saw the spot where i saw the boy yesterday, the boy who begged for something to eat, i tried to look if he was there, i wonder if he would expect to see me again, at the same spot. But he wasnt there, he never had intentions of taking advantage of the goodness i showed him yesterday.
"Gusto ko pa sanang bumawe, hindi ako nag meryenda para sana bumile ng malaking Chips ahoy para sa kanya o bumile sa mcdo ng 1pc chicken meal"
But he wasnt there.
I wonder if he was happy while eating what i gave him, or if he ever thought of sharing it to his friends.
All i know is if i didnt gave him something yesterday, and waited for the next day to come, i would surely regret it for the rest of my life.
Its a good day
its a good day
Wednesday, May 5, 2010
The Boy
I was walking along the streets of Morayta with my Korean friend. I walked her to where she takes her ride home. As we reach national bookstore a little boy about 7 years old if im not mistaken said: "Ate Palimos po, pang kaen ko lang po" I ignored him twice, or thrice.
Hes not the first beggar I've ever encountered, and hes not the first kid whom I've seen begging on the streets of Morayta. I went back and forth from national bookstore to seven eleven, i was too lazy to get him something, and to my surprise i only have 50 pesos in my wallet.
But it seemed that my feet has its own will, and somewhat forced me to walk towards seven eleven and look for something that would fit in a 50 peso bill not to mention i need to save 20 pesos for my ride home. I saw my favorite "Chocolate Crunchies" and so i bought it and went straight to the boy, i felt ashamed for its all i can give and its all i can afford. I was even afraid that he wouldnt take it ("may iba kasing nanlilimos na namimili pa ng gusto nila")
As i went towards him i asked "hijo gusto mo ba ng chocolate?" Then he nodded with that face thats obviously tired and hungry. As i give him the pack of chocolate crunchies, deep inside i felt ashamed telling myself
"pasensya ka na talaga hijo wala na talaga akong pera."
then he immediately said
"Thank you po ate"
As i walk away from him, i knew i made him happy, "alam ko yung binigay ko hindi pa sapat para mabusog siya"
I went off with a broken heart. I gave my best but i was frustrated with the fact that its all i can give at that time. If only i could walk from Morayta to my place i would. And spend the whole 50 peso bill for the boy.
If ever i didnt do that i might regret not doing it forever, I can choose to wait till i graduate and establish programs for the less fortunate but these lives cant wait for two more years! Thats why i chose to do whatever i can.
"Alam naman nating lahat na maraming nagugutom siguro pero kahit minsan ni hindi natin naisip magmalasakit at magbigay sa mga taong kagaya nila, na tila kinalimutan na nating lahat, at sa bawat sakuna, sila ang madals nagiging unang biktima."
I told myself that there's so many things that need to be done in the Philippines. Before i get mesmerized with other countries i would like to fix my own country first. We are so busy about work, school, getting successful, being famous, earning knowledge and all that stuff. We are so engrossed thinking about ourselves but most of the time we forget the value of the Heart. How i wish a new generation of Filipinos will rise with wisdom and a heart.
"Nawawalang saysay ang simabahan at paaralan. Dahil hindi naman natin dinadala sa lansangan ang ating mga natututunan." The real battle isnt on here, the church and the school are samples of our second place for comfort. The real battle is out there!
"Hindi ka magiging tunay na tao sa loob ng simbahan o ng paaralan" In fact these are places where we usually pretend, if not, we absorb but we dont usually use it as part of our daily routine.
Dinadaga na tayong lahat! Kung puro lang tayo talino wala tayong mapapala
Most of the time its not a question of how much you know, its actually a question of the heart.
Jose Rizal wrote: "... Life is very serious matter. It goes well only for those who have intelligence and a heart."
Hes not the first beggar I've ever encountered, and hes not the first kid whom I've seen begging on the streets of Morayta. I went back and forth from national bookstore to seven eleven, i was too lazy to get him something, and to my surprise i only have 50 pesos in my wallet.
But it seemed that my feet has its own will, and somewhat forced me to walk towards seven eleven and look for something that would fit in a 50 peso bill not to mention i need to save 20 pesos for my ride home. I saw my favorite "Chocolate Crunchies" and so i bought it and went straight to the boy, i felt ashamed for its all i can give and its all i can afford. I was even afraid that he wouldnt take it ("may iba kasing nanlilimos na namimili pa ng gusto nila")
As i went towards him i asked "hijo gusto mo ba ng chocolate?" Then he nodded with that face thats obviously tired and hungry. As i give him the pack of chocolate crunchies, deep inside i felt ashamed telling myself
"pasensya ka na talaga hijo wala na talaga akong pera."
then he immediately said
"Thank you po ate"
As i walk away from him, i knew i made him happy, "alam ko yung binigay ko hindi pa sapat para mabusog siya"
I went off with a broken heart. I gave my best but i was frustrated with the fact that its all i can give at that time. If only i could walk from Morayta to my place i would. And spend the whole 50 peso bill for the boy.
If ever i didnt do that i might regret not doing it forever, I can choose to wait till i graduate and establish programs for the less fortunate but these lives cant wait for two more years! Thats why i chose to do whatever i can.
"Alam naman nating lahat na maraming nagugutom siguro pero kahit minsan ni hindi natin naisip magmalasakit at magbigay sa mga taong kagaya nila, na tila kinalimutan na nating lahat, at sa bawat sakuna, sila ang madals nagiging unang biktima."
I told myself that there's so many things that need to be done in the Philippines. Before i get mesmerized with other countries i would like to fix my own country first. We are so busy about work, school, getting successful, being famous, earning knowledge and all that stuff. We are so engrossed thinking about ourselves but most of the time we forget the value of the Heart. How i wish a new generation of Filipinos will rise with wisdom and a heart.
"Nawawalang saysay ang simabahan at paaralan. Dahil hindi naman natin dinadala sa lansangan ang ating mga natututunan." The real battle isnt on here, the church and the school are samples of our second place for comfort. The real battle is out there!
"Hindi ka magiging tunay na tao sa loob ng simbahan o ng paaralan" In fact these are places where we usually pretend, if not, we absorb but we dont usually use it as part of our daily routine.
Dinadaga na tayong lahat! Kung puro lang tayo talino wala tayong mapapala
Most of the time its not a question of how much you know, its actually a question of the heart.
Jose Rizal wrote: "... Life is very serious matter. It goes well only for those who have intelligence and a heart."
Thursday, April 29, 2010
Assailable, odd or just different?
Being a molded clay that doesnt fit in any space isnt easy at all. Assailable, Odd, or just different.
I thought i could be the man and the woman for myself, but my thoughts just lead me to frustration, im not strong enough to play two roles at the same time. Im not discussing about gender here, its just that i wanna stand up for myself just like a man would do to a woman and vice versa. That way it would make me feel strong enough for myself to some degree. Sometimes its even easier to be strong enough for friend than being strong enough for yourself.
I've always stood up for others but never felt what its like when a dear friend would stand up for you. For so long it seemed like i treated this as a daily sadomasochism. I never regret protecting others, but as time pass by, i figured out that i keep giving people something that i never had,or worse, things i can never have. But my question is, how on earth was i capable of giving it to them if i never had it first?
Maybe its something innate, though it is innate, that doesnt necessarily mean that its bound for me, in fact its bound for others, its destiny is to be passed on, and not to be kept.
although i dont get to feel what its like to receive that innate thing, im glad that it made me significant to a number of souls. One at a time.
I thought i could be the man and the woman for myself, but my thoughts just lead me to frustration, im not strong enough to play two roles at the same time. Im not discussing about gender here, its just that i wanna stand up for myself just like a man would do to a woman and vice versa. That way it would make me feel strong enough for myself to some degree. Sometimes its even easier to be strong enough for friend than being strong enough for yourself.
I've always stood up for others but never felt what its like when a dear friend would stand up for you. For so long it seemed like i treated this as a daily sadomasochism. I never regret protecting others, but as time pass by, i figured out that i keep giving people something that i never had,or worse, things i can never have. But my question is, how on earth was i capable of giving it to them if i never had it first?
Maybe its something innate, though it is innate, that doesnt necessarily mean that its bound for me, in fact its bound for others, its destiny is to be passed on, and not to be kept.
although i dont get to feel what its like to receive that innate thing, im glad that it made me significant to a number of souls. One at a time.
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